Childism: Read 1

Link: http://m.psychologytoday.com/blog/child-in-mind/201201/understanding-childism-are-we-prejudiced-against-children

Disclaimer: i am pro-circumsician for boys, and subscribe to the islamic teaching that homosexuality, bisexuality and transvestites of any kind are haram (forbidden) in islam. 

"The problem of improving access to care is a political one."

Now where have i heard that one before...... Hmmmmmm. Ah yes. Birthing and breastfeeding too. If not most of other problems. No, i am not anti-existing ruling party. I am anti-oppression, be it from ANY "party". And this is not a political post. 

"She would point to childism to explain why the health insurance industry and pharmaceutical industry have together been able to create a system where children are more likely to be medicated than listened to. "

Or merely given "air yasin" or whatever WITHOUT reading about their developmental stage and age. 

I actually think the Goverment should get involved somewhat into paying half of the fees for parents to go to:

1. Spousal communication class

2. Childbirth preparation class

3. Breast feeding class

4. Parenting class

Hmmm oh well. The good things in life are not free. Paradise is expensive. Oh well. Seek knowledge anyway. Where there's a will there is a way. 

Cycle of respect, and boundaries of trusting" children- and Islam

Islamic behaviour of non muslims and the handicap of "sleeping" muslims

السلام عليكم 

Topic: Islam is perfect but the muslim is not 

Disclaimer: I am nobody. These are just my heartfelt thoughts /ranting. 

(Level: 02L)

I am confident in how perfect and conclusive and syumul is islam. 

But i am not confident that muslims have done or is doing everything that is contained in islamic teachings.

Seriously.

Does islam "teach" us to leave our child crying its' lungs out just because we need to "teach the baby" to be on his own because we need to go to work and leave him somewhere where people aren't bothered to cradle small babies? 

I do not beg to differ, i fully insist on differing. 

I am fully confident that islam is not rigid in terms of knowledge and certain types of rules... Like treatment towards a birthing mother. 

At the same time I stand rigidly with islam in terms of core, foundational issues such as in issues pertaining to Tauhid (the oneness of Allah). And other issues as homosexuality. There is no exception to it. EVENTHOUGH it does not pertain that people struggling to overcome their (homosexual) issues should be shunned or treated badly. Because islam is just and full of akhlaq and adab taught to us through the behaviour and actions of the prophet muhammad s.a.w

But the main issue is interpreting islam into our roles as parents, husband, wives, etc....... 

Kalau orang islam tidak peduli dan tidak mahu kaji, lantas bersikap "default settings" , "copy paste", "unconscious" atau pak turut saja dengan gaya parenting, kesihatan/pemakanan, dan lain2 aspek kehidupan mereka sbg manusia, adakah sikap ini YANG DI AJARKAN OLEH ISLAM? Is it ISLAMIC to behave this way? 

And is it ISLAMIC to subjugate and generalize that people are incapable of critical thinking ? 

Is it ISLAMIC to have a "we are superior" mindset just because of so-and-so training we get? Even if it is tarbiyyah islamiy, does islam asks us to generalize all issues with the mindset: "we know better"? 

I really have a problem with my muslim brothers and sisters who simply reject things without carefully inspecting the matter. 

If muslims are subscribing to "islamic concepts" which just happen to be put forward by others but minus: The hadiths, The Qur'anic verses, The tauhid, Etc islamic, therefore it does NO GOOD to blame and criticize these brothers and sisters but it does all the good to put effort into advocacy of a systemized /organized promotion of the original thing: islam is complete and syumul and already has all the answers. But if we don't THINK and SEEK critically ENOUGH and UNEARTH this WEALTH ALREADY BUILT INSIDE THIS Deen,  then we are no better than .. What ahmad deedat described as swines dressed with pearls on their necks! 

Everyone reaps only what they sow. So anyone who uses their observational capacity and thinking capacity is fully capable of unearthing hikmah that Allah has placed in everything. It is the mukmin's own horrible lost if he does not use his talents and gifts to steer is way around this world because EVERYONE muslims and non muslims alike have been given the same gifts! A brain; eyes, senses, thinking capacity, etc! 

Everyone is given the same amount of "tickets" or "tools" to enter jannah. Just because you have a muslim name and muslim parents or went to an islamic school of heck-- have had islamic tarbiyyah, does it guarantee you jannah and nobility and superiority  ?

I may be nobody great but i THOUGHT tarbiyyah meant nothing but to make you realize that you are responsible to promote La ilaha illallah- so it's nothing but AMANAH AND RESPONSIBILITY. NOT SUPERIORITY! Not power!  

I totally AGREE that the non muslims still stand and if not promote what is bathil and ignorance to some extent - but we cannot generalize and name- call /label WITHOUT providing people proper and BETTER substitutes  -- the original completely comprehensive guide : islam the way of life as shown by the prophet muhammad s.a.w

Why is it only now we are (still painstakingly slow to ) promoting the "motivating our children the way of the prophet" - yet we would not validate that Yes! In fact Rasulullah's behavior has taught us all of those the west is struggling to promote and instill- connection parenting, attachment parenting, gentle parenting, etc? 

I fear and in fact am confident that there is only one answer: that we have in fact been horribly, horribly sleeping and unconscious and if i may say un-united from realizing that we have practiced and have been successfully misled by deceit and thus PROMOTED things like:

Cry -it -out method ("sleep training" or baby training)

Childism (for lack of knowledge on mental and physical development of children)

Formula milk

And yes- i will say this! Fully medicated birthing without valid medical reasons! 

Will we, will WE  (i say not YOU or THEY, i say WE) learn to unlearn and relearn? Or will we JUST say "we are experts, we are muslims of tarbiyyah, thus we know better"? Surah HUD: verse 87

قَالُوا يَا شُعَيْبُ أَصَلَاتُكَ تَأْمُرُكَ أَن نَّتْرُكَ مَا يَعْبُدُ آبَاؤُنَا أَوْ أَن نَّفْعَلَ فِي أَمْوَالِنَا مَا نَشَاءُ إِنَّكَ لَأَنتَ الْحَلِيمُ الرَّشِيدُ

They said: "O Shu'aib! Does thy (religion of) prayer command thee that we leave off the worship which our fathers practised, or that we leave off doing what we like with our property? truly, thou art the one that forbeareth with faults and is right-minded!" 

I fully enjoin my muslimah brothers and sisters to learn to unlearn and relearn ONLY what is clearly NOT AGAINST our aqidah and tauhid and exercise their critical thinking and learning capacity. Do everything will full consciousness and taking full responsibility over it instead of putting the "blame" or "responsibility" over someone else's shoulders: meaning sayings things like (as shown in example from the above verse) "my father/mother did it before me, they 

/ i turn out right". 

Having said this, i am also a full believer of this and usually would like to practice this unless otherwise emotionally unstable ;

This has not been a very academic piece of writing and yes i will admit it is half if not mostly influenced by emotions and 5-35% of rationality. I sincerely pray the 35% of rational voice will speak out to you. Ameen. 

Thanks for taking the time to read my ranting. Not claiming it as an academic piece worthy of anything anyway. It is a rant. A heartfelt rant. 

السلام عليكم 

Semalam dan hari ini

السلام عليكم 

Semalam dan hari ini

Petang dan pagi

Atas dan bawah

Hitam dan putih

Kiri dan kanan

Semalam makan bangkai

Hari ni jadi bangkai

Semalam makan

Hari ni kena makan

Kalau tidak sedar hukum Allah untuk Dunia

Jadi kecewa 

Jadi marah

Jadi sedih

Jadi bengis

Jadi nangis

Saya orang itu

Hukum di Jannah lain

Jannah 

جنه

Sering terlupa 

Sering lemah

Sering lemah 

Untuk mujahadah

Sering berdalih

Sering malas

Sering hanyut

Sering terikut

Makhluk yang memujuk

Makhluk yang menipu

Rasa nak terus hanyut

Rasa nak berhenti mencuba

Berhenti berlari

Tapi

Itu adalah syaitan 

Itu adalah contoh teladan iblis

Bukan adam

Bukan ayahku adam

Oleh itu

Aku bukan biar diriku lemah

Aku bukan biar diriku malas

Aku pekakkan telinga pada hukuman manusia 

Aku hanya tinggal berdua bersama Allah

Aku tidak sempurna

Tapi aku tidak mahu berputus asa

Dan aku mahu menyatakan aku salah

Aku rasa lega aku masih baik

Aku bukan riyak

Aku masih berharap dengan Allah

Dan itu penting

Untuk orang-orang seperti aku

Nafsu lawwamah

Aku gembira

Walaupun tetap takut dan cemas 

Official statement from the founder of Amani Birth

Asalam alaikum wa rahmatullah wa baraktu, Dear Sisters and Brothers,

It is with great pain and sadness that we join in the mourning of a dear sister who recently lost her life after the birth of her baby during an unassisted home birth in Malaysia.  May Allah have mercy on her and grant much ease to her family and all persons who have been touched by this loss.

With this event comes an obligation for AMANI Birth to publicly state what we have always taught in our written materials and what we teach when we train AMANI Birth Teachers and Doulas.

In the AMANI Birth Student Workbook that is used by our teachers in classes with expectant parents it is assumed that there will be a medical caregiver at the birth (doctor or midwife) and we teach mothers to be good birth consumers by shopping around for the provider they feel most comfortable with and who will support their needs during pregnancy and birth.  In fact, the workbook clearly states:

“Notice:  AMANI supports your decisions regarding your birth and advocates for natural birth with minimal medical interventions.  However, we do not advise you to forego prenatal care or to plan an unassisted birth.  We encourage prenatal education and informed consent.  Our premise is that you do your own research and seek out birth care professionals you trust, who will support your decisions and will not interfere unless complications arise.”

The Student Workbook also describes the role of a doula stating she is, “…a professional, but not a medical professional.  She cannot give medical advice, predictions, diagnosis, or treatments.  She will never make a decision for you and cannot advocate on your behalf…”

In addition to these statements in the written materials, I would like to point out that when we do live trainings with our teachers and doulas our stance is similar to the statement below, which comes from an email written to a perspective doula trainee back in June:

“I want to point out that although many AMANI Birth mothers choose to homebirth unassisted in Malaysia, that is NOT the focus of our training.  We teach women to prepare for their birth and trust in Allah, while seeking out proper attendance for the event.  In fact, we encourage good birth consumerism, not avoidance of care all together.  

We do NOT encourage homebirth alone, although we support women’s choices if that is the decision she makes.  Also I want to ensure that you understand that being a doula is not the same as being a midwife and if you choose to attend homebirths you put yourself at risk if the parents expect you to be there to rescue mom and baby should something go wrong.  It takes years of study and clinical practice in order to truly have the level of skill to attend homebirths in such a way that you are prepared to recognize and deal with any emergency that may come up.

I just wanted to be very clear for you so that you are not disappointed or expecting to be trained as a midwife, rather than a Doula.  You may want to read http://www.saudilife.net/motherhood/5569-what-is-a-doula for clarification of the Doula’s role.”

With that said, it is important to understand that AMANI Birth Teachers and Doulas are not employees of AMANI Birth, they are certified after training to use our materials to work with expectant parents.  We cannot control the actions of any person, that being the parents who may decide to birth unassisted or the women who may choose to attend their births.  However, we would hope that everyone involved is informed going into such a situation of the risks and that the role of the doula as a support of the parents emotionally and physically is in no way a substitute for medical care should an emergency arise.

 Obviously, we cannot comment on the recent case at hand and AMANI headquarters has no knowledge of the agreements or understandings that may have been arranged between the concerned family and the doula that attended her birth.  We do know that this tragedy is a great loss to the community and especially to the family and our hearts and prayers are with them during this time.  

For all expectant families, please know that birth is generally a safe and joyful event, but please do not underestimate the realities of risk and always do your part to seek out information, advice, and evidence so that you can make the best decisions for your family.  We are not here to judge the choices you make.  We serve as one of your many resources, which should also include your medical birth team, when making decisions.

It is also important to note that the growing trend towards unassisted birth in the Malaysian community was developed and thriving long before AMANI Birth had any contacts there.  It would be prudent to examine the underlying social issues that are driving mothers to choose birthing alone.  This recent tragedy is a symptom of larger issues that deserve to be addressed and we must tune in to listen to women’s voices as they speak out through the birthing choices they make.

Please do not hesitate to contact info@amanibirth.com should you have any additional questions about AMANI Birth.  May Allah bless each one with good health and ease throughout the pregnancy and birth journey.

Written by:

Sister Aisha al hajjar

Founder of Amani Birth International 

Kiamat, angka, al-qur'an dan...WHATSAPP

[OBSESI KIAMAT...]

Alhamdulillah, ramai umat Islam memang beriman dengan hari AKHIRAT...

Buktinya... ramai yang suka 'SHARE' perkara-perkara yang berlaku di akhir-akhir ini dan dikatakan hari kiamat akan berlaku....

Masjid tak runtuh walaupun bencana alam berlaku... kiamat nak dekat...

Sejadah sembahyang di surau tertentu... kiamat nak dekat...

Tulisan al-Quran hilang di subuh hari... kiamat nak dekat...

Gerhana matahari mucul di bulan tertentu... kiamat nak dekat...

Terlihat angka 13... kiamat nak dekat...

Lahir bayi bermata satu di negara itu... kiamat nak dekat...

Binatang besar muncul di negara ini... kiamat nak dekat...

Negara tertentu turun salji... kiamat nak dekat...

Hinggakan berita Mr Bean masuk Islam pun... kiamat nak dekat...

Senarai ini akan terus bertambah kerana umat Islam memang OBSESI kepada AKHIRAT...

Ada yang FAKTA... tak kurang juga ada yang AUTA... yang penting biar manusia tahu kiamat sudah dekat...

Yang hairannya, kenapa masjid masih belum penuh dengan umat Islam yang beriman dengan kiamat ini... Sedangkan ALLAH berfirman:

"Hanya yang memakmurkan masjid-masjid Allah ialah orang-orang yang beriman kepada Allah dan Hari kemudian (AKHIRAT), serta tetap mendirikan shalat, menunaikan zakat dan tidak takut (kepada siapapun) selain kepada Allah, maka merekalah orang-orang yang diharapkan termasuk golongan orang-orang yang mendapat petunjuk." (Surah at-Taubah ayat 18)

YA... Kiamat memang dekat... Akan tetapi bila lagi diri ini ingin DEKAT kepada Tuhannya... Fikir-fikirkanlah dan selamat beramal....

* Tiada salahnya utk berkongsi tanda-tanda akhir zaman untuk peringatan bersama... akan tetapi pastikan sumbernya SAHIH dan BENAR... kemudian, beramallah segera sebagai persediaan dan persiapan untuk kita menghadapinya... Wallahu 'alam bis showab...

Pemulauan Kaum Musyrik Quraisy

Aku tak pernah memahami dan cenderung untuk tidak setuju dengan keteguhan IM untuk tidak mengangkat senjata pada coup de ta. Tapi setelah menonton episode 9 siri mbc ‘Umar’, episode berkenaan tahun-tahun pembesar Quraish telah melancarkan strategy boycott kepada kaum muslimin Makkah, tiba-tiba aku rasa aku faham. Sayyidina Hamzah tidak senang dengan pemulauan itu, tiada siapa yang senang dan selesa dengan pemulauan itu. Bayi dan anak-anak menangis, anak-anak kecil meninggal, hatta Abu Talib dan Khadijah juga wafat. Tapi Rasulullah hanya menurut arahan Allah. Belum masanya untuk Qital. Para sahabat semua akur dengan arahan Allah dan RasulNya, sabar. Oh Allah.