Dear mother: Judge

Dear Mother

I am not judging you. I may do so silently in my head and quietly also I correct myself, it is not my place to judge. I also cut corners, I also do what I can. I am also weak and am grasping for air full of hope, strength and motivation. 

You are only human. And so am I. You and I we sometimes forget to remember this, we judge and feel judged. 

But it's ok. We can also forgive and love again. 

Your journey is yours and my journey is mine. Sometimes they might appear to be intertwining and no matter how much they do, it is always an individual journey. A solitary yet accompanied and happy journey of two energies- us as one and Allah as one. 

Good night, Mother. 

Years: Musa

How did you get so big, Musa? When did you grow so tall? Only yesterday I was grueling over making enough milk for you. Agonizing over if you will be ok while I am away, just for a few hours. How have you grown so tall, so talkative, so intelligent, was I asleep or comatose while you grew up silently, Musa? Where have the years gone, Musa? 

Musa: 5-6 years old

He seems so big already :(

It's as if only yesterday i was holding him in my arms, little fragile baby....

Tadabbur: infaq

Benarkan saya membeli sedikit hartanah syurga dengan matawang dunia. 

Power of Do'a: Stop saying positive affirmations!

Assalamua'laikum

Do NOT replace DO'A with 'positive affirmations'. 

Kata-kata ialah do'a : said someone- "to speak is to say a prayer".

"Positive affirmations" CAN NEVER BE THE SAME as and CAN NEVER REPLACE the status of a do'a in the sight of Allah. It is two different things. 

WHO are you "calling to" when you speak positive affirmations? Yourself? How can you EVER benefit your own self without Allah's permission and control and power? 

YOU can never be the same level as Allah. Are your powers comparable to Allah? NEVER! 

Allah loves to hear us seek Him. So turn and replace or DISCARD ALL "positive affirmations" and turn them into DO'A. 

It's not too late. Do it NOW! 

The best of helpers: Friends who remind you to remember Allah

Be thankful to Allah for this gift: people in your life who remind you to remember and seek Allah. Make do'a for those people that they are rewarded with the ultimate reward : jannah. 

Questions from doula to client

Assalamua'laikum

I devised this questionnaire when a close friend wanted me to be around her during her birth as "support" for her hubby. Please feel free to use or edit for use with your own clients. 

1. How do u relax/destress esp. during pregnancy? 

2. What are your chosen comfort measures for birth? 

3. When do you expect me to accompany you after the surges has started i.e immediately @ ASAP or when it starts to get intense?

4. How do u imagine the support of a birth companion would be? 

5. How do u feel u would like to be supported during birth by a birth companion (who is not your hubby?)

6. According to your previous experience (if any) do u like to be touched/massaged during labor and birth? 

7. How comfy are you with a birth companion observing or touching your private areas?